This is America, Interracial Dating, Donald Glover (Childish Gambino) and Pro-Blackness …. opening thoughts.
This topic gets way too Oversimplified ….. I was on IG recently talking about new revelations; stuff i never knew that I became aware of because of people ‘hating on Donald‘, saying he isn’t pro-black, ‘because of who he dates’ therefore let us disregard his art ….. when none of us are about to disregard the contributions of a Nina Simone, or Maya Angelou;
When so many of our Pro-Black activists and spokes people are often products of these interracial relationships; ole Boy ‘with the eyes’ all the ladies like, that made that talk, about how Police can manage to arrest whites without incident but always shoot us up; he’s half white; was his father a self hating sell out; or did he also just meet someone who appreciated him as a person; and they vibed; because they clearly raised a son who is Consciously aware of the issues the society needs to fix.
I also am partial on the issue because I do a lot of family research; and a lot of my ‘backstory’ is mixed; then I know people who are very woke; always have been; but also swirl it up; so it’s complicated >> meanwhile >>> I’ve met a lot of sellouts who only date black — Ben Carson wife is black; Omarosa husband is black; a ton of black people working Against black people’s interests, for selfish, personal gain, are black …. meritorious manumissions is still in effect in 2018 ….I mean …. we need to be ‘better than white folks’ … not just like them.
Pro-black isn’t anti-white last time I checked; way too over simplified out here ….
Those opening thoughts were inspired by a post on Facebook …. regarding This is America.
In light of Donald Glover (Childish Gambino) dating preference/choices; and statements about Black women not wanting to dating him, as he was growing up, due to him being considered “weird, nerdish, etc…”
Which, if we are honest…there are many Black men and Black women who feel this way…
We can’t ignore that for some, the “choice” was made for them, in their formative years.
It’s more than rhetoric, conjecture, or mere opinion. When you get told something constantly, throughout your early life, it shapes how you see and interact with the world (at least partially) as an adult. It’s the priming effect, operant/inoperant conditioning. Stimuli reinforcement.
Thus if you are told (or made to feel) over and over again, within your experiences, that you aren’t a good enough dating candidate within your particular people group, you’ll most likely aim for success away from/outside of that people group. Unless there is something, within your experience that counteracts/offsets the negative perception one may have formed, and the stress one may physically feel, when they now try to date within their own people group. (original source on fB)
In spite of the strong message in This Is America, the conversation shifted to the artist. Ignoring the art, to break down the artist seems to be the thing in this nation. Judging the messenger, in order to miss the message is what we are all about!
Before I get into that, listen to The Young Turks break down some of the symbolic hidden messages, in the This is America video….
Full context – of the FB post above
Fact is, I never saw y’all making Donald Glover your #MCM when he was writing for 30 Rock and acting on The Community… Took for him to start rapping and getting cosigns from your favorite trap rappers for y’all to pay attention… So you can quit lying like y’all[black women….regular ones, not my fellow Black nerds ✊] have always messed with the “alternative black guy” .
…. Y’all weren’t in gaming message boards trying to put together clans and finding out how to code your game for character mods, y’all weren’t rolling in packs to cosplay events, and in all of my years skating I have never eevvveerrrrrr seen y’all come by the skate park to kick it, like Asian and white girls did…. The funny part about being a nerdy black dude is that black people automatically assume you hate yourself just because you dont do “typical black people” shit lol… Everything you do, it’s because “you wanna be white,” even when you date… Disregarding the fact that maybe a nigga is just dating someone who appreciates or shares their interests, not because they are an “other”
…..so you can stop being fake surprised that he(and men like him) dates outside his race……. I have more than enough first hand experience on this subject so we can debate all day, I got time……. *before Y’all start: yes this goes both ways, but we’re not talking about black men and nerdy nlack girls, dont “All Lives Matter” this subject*
Being black in America is complicated.
Being a black Man is even tougher; when you don’t really ‘fit in’ all the way with the rest of black America. So i get where this post is coming from – as a super light skinned black man who’s always had issues within and from the outside of my community.
Trouble is, a lot of my own people don’t like to admit it, or talk about that part honestly. My brother calls me white to this day; he’s joking of course, and it’s love of course, and yet, that is still a perception a lot of black people have towards us light skinned black people;
We do have a lot of nonsensical light skin vs dark skin debates in our community, but… we not really being real about how that impacts us; our unity; our strength, our progress collectively etc… and aren’t being honest about how we do push some of our own out of our community; then get mad at them for not coming back after we sent them away;
If we can be real, Laura didn’t like Steve Urkel; she liked that other dude he turned into …….
So there is a real, psychological issue that we don’t want to be honest about, as a whole here — we’re also ignoring that a lot of black nerds do link up together; but that ‘nerd community’ is highly white-washed; Let’s go into this commentary from Yvette Carnell. She hits home with tough but honest comments about black people, and our perceptions.
Everybody runs in the end. Because, this is America
There is endless commentary out there on This is America. I decided to share this take from Yvette Carnel as the outro. “Get your money Black man” …. is absolutely a cliche. As she points out, too many black people live their lives through caches. Meanwhile, not enough people are able to focus. Instead of looking at the real message in the video, we’re caught up in who he sleeps with. In so many ways, the disappointing reactions to the Bill Cosby verdict, is related. Black people’s lives are in chaos, and constantly fooled by white views.
Somehow, black people have bought into white racism. The idea that we are not all humans, isn’t being embraced by black people. It’s difficult to blame black people entirely for this. In so many ways, it is the eventuality of being in a white system – that only lifts up white; and keeps black down. The natural Reaction to that system, is anyone who is black that embraces ‘white’ …. instead of ‘black exclusively’, is viewed as ‘selling out black people’, when that isn’t the definition of that term. Selling black people out, while black, has more to do with being dishonest about the situations black people are in, and how we got there. It’s teaming up with white people to tell lies about black and white culture, history, present and future.
We’re all told over and over, that no one is holding black people back. In so many ways, you’ll hear people suggest black people hold themselves back. That’s what Candace Owens has Kanye West saying. Kanye seems to be, attempting to ‘break out’ of the limitations of what black is defined as, in white society. In that process he’s saying a few things that are real valid; while saying other things that are entirely misguided. He may also be, in his own way, attempting to lift black people ‘out’ of those boxes as well ‘while’ existing in a very oppressive white reality. I mean just how pro-black can you be, in the midst of white moderates anyway??
But, as Yvette excellently points out, we have to get over who people are dating. It’s bigger than that. So many other things matter, more….
Instead of focusing on who people date, we need to focus on the messages people send our way.
Is the message true, or misleading?
When Kanye West says slavery was a choice, that is misleading. It’s going to get a lot of support from white people though, and it has. That absurd talking point is something too many of them believe already. Having a black person say it for them, is their Modus Operandi.
Too many black people missed what Byron Allen was saying because we were caught up in who he sleeps with. – Yvette Carnell
I love that She compares a show I enjoy, actually from Issa Rae, with another show I also enjoy, from Donald Glover. If we really look at Insecure, vs. Atlanta, we see two very different interpretations of black life in America. She points out how unrealistic Issa’s show is, vs how realistic Donald’s Atlanta is. She’s entirely right too.
Does Interracial Dating some how, erode the Pro-blackness of a black man or woman?
This is America and interracial dating is as much a fabric of our nation as anything else is. But, to the direct discussion on pro-blackness and interracial dating, I learned something. These debates exposed me to information I never knew. Maya Angelou, and Nina Simone both married white men. None of us would dare say that their relationships with white men eroded their ability to speak truth to power. (read about Maya Angelou and Paul Du Feu here. A photo of Nina Simone and her first husband Don Ross below. This Is America)
Is it possible that black men and women who date outside their race, know more about non-black people and systems? Perhaps their close exposure to other cultures, also includes exposure to information the rest of us do not have? In my opening thoughts, I shared my views already. Some of the most outspoken people for civil rights, economic equality, and progress are products of interracial dating & relationships.
Donald Glover may date non-black women, but he knows who he is.
He has not forgotten or sacrificed his blackness, to be accepted by white people. Read his comments on how black people should get reparations. As Yvette points out, contrast what Donald Glover says, against what Issa Rae is on, all of a sudden. Juxtapose that with what Kanye West was saying …. and understand that who we date, is not as important as the stances we take on social issues…. This is America and it’s not short on issues.